MissLed Women and the 7 Deadly Sins

Today, rather than being bulwarks for each other, men and women, in essence, use each other, often ruthlessly. As a result, distrust is everywhere.  Cynicism is rampant. Men - and, increasingly women -  too often are betraying trusts, and unscrupulously using and manipulating each another.  In essence, we live in a leaner, meaner society. How did this happen? To a large extent, it is because, in the last two or three decades, too many women have been MissLed.  Who - or what - misleads women?  In our culture of flagrant self-exaltation, what  seems to have been forgotten is that people behave better with a clear road map concerning right and wrong. Living without a moral compass or ethical map leaves far too many confused and rudderless.  Not knowing of the characteristics or habits of virtue results in their tolerating (or not recognizing) far too many wrongs.  "Values" have largely replaced virtues in predominance in education. Currently, most people seem to believe that society would be better served - safer, healthier, happier - if the right "values" are promoted.  For them, as long as people have a "good heart" and "mean well" (whatever those phrases mean) they are deemed "good."  After all, their values are their own.  

Instead of doing the virtuous thing, intending to do the "right thing"  matters most now. The habits and benefits of time-tested virtues are largely ignored - they are seen as too closely tied to religion. Current secular beliefs stem from assuming people are inherently good, so merely reinforcing that view with values is sufficient.  On the other hand, many religions, including Judaism and Christianity, see humans as inherently flawed.  They therefore emphasize virtuous habits as a preventative measure to tip the scale toward a more moral life. They also emphasize strength of will to resist immediate gratification. Those behaviors that are beyond immediate wants and supposed "needs" and toward long-term happiness are advocated by most religions. Unfortunately, modern society generally does not emphasize  character building,  or developing habits of virtue and self-sacrifice. Religion's former primary role of providing strict moral guidance  has been largely discarded. Christianity and Judaism possess many profound, proven internal theological resources with which to live civilly. However, the secular, "don't judge," "live and let live" moral relativism that has attempted to replace religion's formerly predominant social mores has largely failed to fill that vacuum. The result? Too many women have been misdirected into moral lassitude, unhappiness and identity confusion. They have even joined in a society of increased coarseness, schadenfreude, and a concurrent decrease of justly focused compassion and empathy.  This is deeply troubling, because authentic moral living begins with empathy:

"When empathy is born, care is born, and with it, morality. Morality explores the implications of the discovery and appreciation that someone other that ones self is real and valuable." Richard M Gula, Reason Informed by Faith, (NY:  Paulist Press, 1989) 14.

Most MissLed women are, misguidedly, social relativists. This works to their detriment:

"Social relativists look to what society approves in order to know what is morally right or wrong." Richard M Gula, Reason Informed by Faith, (NY:  Paulist Press, 1989) 16.

"Personal relativists use the criterion of self-satisfaction to confirm what is right or wrong. "Do your own thing" is their familiar slogan.  For them, the tools of psychology would be sufficient to determining whether a person is really satisfied or not. Not far behind...the emotivist school which claims 'The good is what I feel comfortable with.' This school regards all moral evaluations as simply expressions of emotions, but not as statements which could be true or false. Ethical relativisms such as these will always be a seductive force in a confusing world. " Richard M Gula, Reason Informed by Faith, (NY:  Paulist Press, 1989) 17.

Religion's misdeeds - most prominently the misogyny and violence associated  with Islam and the scandals of the Catholic Church - resulted in the loss of much of its moral credibility. It didn't help religion's credibility when so many of its modern authority figures were exposed as moral or ethical hypocrites or failures.  Much was lost, however, in throwing the baby out with the bathwater.  In fact, Muslim and Judeo-Christian teachings on human behavior and personal morality contain invaluable, profound truths regarding human nature along with time-tested guidance for human behavior that have been forgotten or dismissed as misogynist, "judgmental," or "passé'." 

What is most striking about the new ethical and moral paradigm is that too many women now willingly, often enthusiastically, choose to misbehave in the form described by the SEVEN DEADLY SINS - Pride, Greed, Envy, Anger, Lust, Gluttony and Sloth.  Despite the numerous examples - in both current events and history -  of the extreme harm done to those who fail to avoid these sins, somehow, incredibly, these vices are largely encouraged in the current cultural climate. 

Unfortunately the current socio-political culture panders to the worst tendencies in women.  Too many women are seduced into expending their precious, finite emotional and intellectual energy on the trivial and the absurd. They are captivated by the hollow stagecraft of  celebrity culture, with its dark voyeurism into other people’s humiliation, pain, weakness and betrayal. Women who unknowingly think these behaviors harmless, acceptable, or even beneficial are tragically MissLed.  They would be wise to ponder:

"For the most part, these vices are manifestations of our refusal to master our physical and psychological impulses." Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 1995) 3.

(and MissLed women don't even know the value of -  how they need - self-control):

"The vices also operate at the social level.  They permeate politics and commerce, and saturate popular culture and entertainment. Some, such as pride, greed, and anger, profoundly influence domestic and foreign policy. Solomon Schimmel, Seven Deadly Sins, (NY:  Oxford, University Press, 1997) 4.

"The deadly sins are not arbitrary, irrational restrictions on human behavior. On the contrary, most sins or vices, and the seven deadly ones in particular, concern the core of what we are, of what we can become, and most importantly, of what should aspire to be.  Amoral psychology is uncomfortable with "oughts" - it prefers to think it can deal with facts about human nature, shunning values." Solomon Schimmel, Seven Deadly Sins, (NY:  Oxford, University Press, 1997) 5.

Ironically, this is a situation where too many women are misbehaving badly and concurrently reporting decreased levels of well-being:

"While the expansion in women’s opportunities has been extensively studied, the concurrent decline in subjective well-being has largely gone unnoticed...Social changes that have occurred over the past four decades have increased the opportunities available to women, and a standard economic framework would suggest that these expanded opportunities for women would have increased their welfare. However, others have noted that with the expansion of opportunities have come costs, and that men may have been the beneficiaries of the women’s movement...women in the United States have become less happy, both absolutely and relative to men. Women have traditionally reported higher levels of happiness than men, but they are now reporting happiness levels that are similar or even lower than those of men."
http://bpp.wharton.upenn.edu/betseys/papers/Paradox%20of%20declining%20female%20happiness.pdf

The Seven Deadly Sins are far too common among MissLed women. They commit these vices (as anonymously as possible) of Pride, Greed, Envy, Anger, Lust, Gluttony, and Sloth. By denying that they behave this way, MissLed women dread and avoid the two emotions that causes their unhappiness:  Shame and Guilt. This unhappiness is largely due to women being MissLed - miseducated by radical feminists, misinfluenced by the messages from the media, and misguided by parents to the point that they misconstrue destructive vices such as Pride, Greed, Envy, Anger, Lust, or Gluttony as harmless, even benevolent, characteristics.  In fact, there are compelling, time-tested reasons why they  are called the Seven Deadly Sins. Here's how today's culture is reflected through the lens of the Seven Deadly Sins:
 
1.  PRIDE:  MissLed women's desire to be more important or attractive than others, their failure to acknowledge the good work of others, and their excessive love of themselves.  They are misproud in terms of their arrogance, conceit and vanity.  It is manifested in vanity and narcissism with their appearance, intelligence,  or status. MissLed women who have excessive pride exaggerate their abilities and accomplishments. Pride makes them misinterpret that they are better than everyone else, “above the rules.” This allows them to rationalize behaviors such as lying, cheating, stealing, insulting, and refusing to accept legitimate authority over them. MissLed by media messages that promote unwarranted self-pride and and marketers who prey on their fears of inadequacy, they often succumb to excessive pride, claiming it as "empowerment."  Inordinately inflated self-esteem,  self-promotion, and self-proclamation among MissLed women represent the plentiful, growing evidence of the prominence of this vice. Unfortunately, MissLed women misinterpret the cultural mantras of "believe in yourself" and "girl power" as license for excessive pride.

In fact, some MissLed women have even fallen to the level of hubris.  As a result, they have a naive or misplaced confidence in their own judgment and powers of persuasion.  Too often, they overrate - and overstate  - their modest accomplishments as hyperbole ("Amazing!").  In many ways, MissLed women are afflicted because they never outgrew the quite normal, adolescent developmental phase of hubris. With proper support and wise parental empowering this gets converted to confidence.  Without those,  the narcissistic, false pride can carry over into adulthood. Hubris then develops in MissLed women out of fear - fear of being inadequate, of less than a person, and less than those around them.  Fearful MissLed women  will go to any extreme to prove to others they are adequate, effective, or correct. Women who are comfortable with themselves, on the other hand, know that there is no need for show, for strutting or bragging. In fact, silent women with knowledge possess more humility than the loud spoken professional who misstates they have the corner marketed on their specialty. MissLed women are too often prone to excessive pride due to having substantial blind spots - both optical and psychological. These blind spots enhance their pride , activate their prejudices, and deactivate their judgment:

"A 2008 Survey found that a shocking 1 out of 4 teen girls has sent a nude picture of herself via the Internet or cell phone."  Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, Narcissism Epidemic,  (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 146.

"Cosmetic procedures in 2007 "more than 5 times as many as in 1997."  Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, Narcissism Epidemic, (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 148.

Too many MissLed women are evolving  - backwards - becoming more focused on their looks than ever. The only ''progress'' is that some are now willing to own up to extreme  exertions in cosmetology.

Vanity is a type of MissLed women's Pride that involves their excessive belief in their own abilities or attractiveness to others:

"There is a new standard of vanity, where it is not enough to be beautiful, you have to be HOT." Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, Narcissism Epidemic, (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 142.

"Extraordinary beauties can lose perspective on the big picture because of a distorted lens through which they view the world. Combined with the arrogance of youth, their hotness itself can impede them."  According to Edith Jacobson, Psychoanalyst, "Catered to all of their lives, beauties become convinced that they can get whatever they want and whomever they want, a stance bound to lead to frustration."   Elizabeth Ford and Daniela Drake, MD, Smart Girls Marry Money, (Philadelphia, PA: Running Press, 2009) 157.

Beauty, in fact, is a challenge - both a powerful gift and a curse - for many women.  For many MissLed women, unfortunately, it is often power they don't handle wisely.  For them, it often allows them to get by without having to develop a good work ethic.  Too often, they don't grow and mature in key ways during their early adult years.  At the peak of their beauty, they too often fail to keep up with their peers in career pursuits, education, or in moral growth.  Sadly, later in life, as their beauty and power fade, they often become bitter, depressed, or disillusioned. For MissLed women who are vain, they live in constant worry about  the waning powers of their beauty and sex appeal.  Yet, ironically, it only serves to isolates them, and make them more prone to being passive, even lazy.

Another form of destructive, misguided Pride some MissLed women are prone to is Self-Serving Pride: 

"This kind of pride encompasses both power and materialism, and the latter is primarily a game of 'show me the money'...People who play this game will focus their attention on whatever will reward them the most monetarily, and whatever will position them to control the most resources (human and economic).  Hence, they are likely to shift their allegiances to whatever organizations or occupational pursuits offer the highest monetary compensation, promise the greatest wealth-accumulation opportunities, and thereby provide the most personal recognition and influence...Loyalty and commitment play secondary roles in their motivation."  Eva S. Moskowitz, In Therapy We Trust:  America's Obsession with Self,  (Baltimore, MD:  Johns Hopkins U. Press, 2001) 29.

"...self-serving pride based on materialism and power is seldom an admirable attribute."
Jon R Katzenbach, Why PRIDE Matters More Than Money, (NY:  Random House, 2003) 38.

Most tragically, Pride often prevents many MissLed women from seeking necessary help and wisdom from others and from working effectively with others. Pride promotes arrogance. MissLed women react to others comments and opinions with "They shouldn't think that way, they should think they way we do."

They have misguided expectations of copious compliments and unconditional acceptance.
MissLed women's unquestioned presumption that their way of life defines how everyone else should live - demonstrates that pride has many destructive manifestations.

Despite all of its damaging impact, Pride is not, however,  always a vice:

"Authentic pride has nothing in common with bragging, boasting, or arrogance. It comes from an opposite root. Not emptiness but satisfaction is its wellspring. It is not out to "prove" but to enjoy. Nor is pride the delusion that we are without flaws or shortcomings (as religionists sometimes suggest). We can take pride in what we have done or what we have made of ourselves while acknowledging our errors and imperfections. We can feel pride while owning and accepting what Jungians call our "Shadow." In short, pride in no way entails obliviousness to reality. Pride is the emotional reward of achievement." Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 1995) 40-41.

"Virtue and high achievement create feelings of pride that amply reward us for the unusual dedication and effort required. But pride is more than simply an emotional reward for high achievement; it also motivates us toward such achievement." Jon R Katzenbach, Why PRIDE Matters More Than Money, (NY:  Random House, 2003) 2.

2. GREED:

"Poverty is real. But wealth is an illusion." Gregory Jeffrey, Why Enough is Never Enough, (Huntington, IN:  Our Sunday Visitor, 2010) 12

"Perhaps civilization is so unwise because nothing is ever enough for it." Peter Kreeft, Three Philosophies of Life, (San Francisco:  Ignatius Press, 1989) 17.

Contrary to the popular perception, greed is about much more than money. MissLed women can also be greedy about letting others get proper credit or praise. Greedy MissLed women often misguidedly cherish things more than they cherish people or relationships. Like its sister-vice, gluttony, Greed is when they misguidedly seek to consume for the sheer pleasure of consuming - without regard to moderation. Greed can ruin MissLed women's marriages, destroy their friendships, and divide their families.  Over pursuit of self-gratification leaves them anxiety-ridden, and no amount of money will ever lift their anxiety about money:

"Persistent worries about money are a weight that millions live with every day, sapping the joy out of life." Gregory Jeffrey, Why Enough is Never Enough,   (Huntington, IN:  Our Sunday Visitor, 2010) 11.

Greed is also often a form of self-worship. It is the opposite of the virtues of charity, generosity and love. Too many MissLed women selfishly demand to get what they claim to be their "fair share" - or more - sometimes much, much more. With women joining the work force in increasing numbers, and now controlling the majority of income, more have fallen under greed's seductive spell. This self-destructive, inordinate desire for wealth and "stuff" has become nearly as common as Envy. Excessive purchases - shoe-buying, purchasing of unaffordable homes and frivolous material goods and the crippling personal debt of the average American household are attributable, at least in part, to MissLed women's greed. This is rationalized, or, even worse, disguised, as "empowerment," assertiveness, or ambition.

"An incredible 93% of teenage girls say that shopping is their favorite activity." Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, Narcissism Epidemic,  (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 163. 
(and who thinks this is cute/harmless?  MissLed Moms and the teens' peers)

Similarly, coveting is a type of vice reflecting many MissLed women's skewed value systems. This is often disguised or rationalized as a "need" when it really is a want - a shrill cry for their instant gratification. Coveting is their specific, focused desire, a desire to have a particular thing, which belongs to a particular person. MissLed women who covet desire their neighbor’s car, their house, or, increasingly - their husband. It is a sort of combination of "hyper-greed" and "super-lust" -  well defined and specifically focused. What MissLed women covet, then, become their goals.  Since they covet the wrong things,  therefore the goals strive for are shallow or materialistic.  Subsequently,  too often they sacrifice things of great value in an effort to attain what has little, or no, ultimate value.
 
Some MissLed women are susceptible to coveting because they embrace the increasingly common attitude of entitlement. When this is present in tandem with undisciplined emotions, it makes for a toxic, coveting mindset.  They often covet because they are not content with what they already have, no matter how much that might be - they want more, more, more. MissLed women will even covet the forbidden - that which belongs to another and which would be better off not obtained ("be careful what you wish for"). The selfishness and deviousness of these desires prompt MissLed women to conceal them. In fact, they often disguise forbidden wants as a matter of feelings, (i.e. "the heart wants what the heart wants," etc.).  Such an explanation can be effective.  It can seem plausible to like-minded others in the today's culture of emotionality.

Covetousness too often corrupts MissLed women - it tends to strongly hinder their generosity. Tellingly, they see generosity as a threat to the accumulation of the things they strongly desire.  They become the slave of their passion for possessions.  (Insightful men believe retail therapy is for women who are emotionally impaired, especially if a woman is over 35). It is often seen as a "worship" of a specific item that they want to purchase. ("OMG, I've got to have that Hermes bag," "I'll die if I don't get that new Lexus").  Seldom,  ignorance of what is right (or wrong)  is the reason for MissLed women's vices; rather, it is their emotional decision to desire the wrong things, and to do whatever is necessary to have them:

"Most of us are just feeling-chasers. When we have a feeling we like, we do everything in our power to hold on to it, and if the feeling goes away, we go on a mad chase to try and get it back."  Michelle Langley, Women's Infidelity, (St Louis:  McCarlan Publishing, 2005) 81-82.

Coveting is strongly encouraged in much of society - so much so that if coveting were to immediately cease in America, the economy would be in shambles. Madison Avenue incites MissLed women to covetousness, and credit card purchases enables them to buy what they don’t need and can’t afford. Ironically, if their coveting, envy, vanity, and greed were to be severely reduced, Wall Street would quickly collapse.

Women's increased financial and career ambition and competitiveness is another factor in the rise of their material greed and covetousness. Too often, they covet what their neighbor or co-worker have: their position, their prestige and power, and their pleasures. Covetousness is consequently interwoven into the fabric of our society. Indeed, today's consumer society accepts - even promotes - MissLed women's covetousness as one of the “givens” of our culture.

Like Pride, greed and coveting are not necessarily a bad thing.  "Greed is good"  - as Gordon Gecko infamously declared in Wall Street - when it drives women to have measured ambition for success in love, education, their career, and benevolent goals in life.  In essence, one may covet in a good sense or in a bad sense, depending on the context in which the term is used. Coveting is only evil for the MissLed women who covet the wrong things, for the wrong reasons.

3.  ENVY:
"Envy is the consuming desire to make everyone around us as miserable as we are.” - Oscar Wilde
"...now that their liberation has allowed them entry in the great sweepstakes of the world's prize, I wonder if they (women) won't fall victim to all the other realms of envy - small and large, realistic and goofy - to which men have been prey.  If they do - and I suspect they will - then one can only welcome them to the carnival with its carousel of desires that never seem to relent, desires that stir competitive feelings, fantastical hopes, infuriating disappointments. Welcome, ladies, to the world of the envious."  Joseph Epstein, Envy:  The Seven Deadly Sins, (NY: Oxford University Press, 2003) 28.

The Latin word for Envy is invidia, literally, “the evil eye.” It is to look on others with malice, to misguidedly focus on wanting what others possess. Those MissLed women who fall prey to Envy resent the good others receive or may receive - often maliciously. They resent that another person has something they perceive themselves as lacking, so they wish the other person to be deprived of it. This often involves thoughts, longings, and, finally, plans for getting what the envier desires. In carrying out their envying actions, MissLed enviers demonstrate a fundamentally negative character; they want to bring others down, rather than take the effort to raise themselves up:

"Envy is more toxic than simple jealousy. It can destroy the possibility of hope and diminish capacity for enjoyment." Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, Narcissism Epidemic,  (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 160.

Envy is their intense resentment of an advantage (lifestyle, physical appearance, social status, wealth, creative gift, etc.) that is enjoyed by another person.  It is combined with their strong desire to possess what that person has. Most of them do not admit their Envies, even with family or friends. They are often embarrassed when they Envy someone, even keeping it a secret from themselves. Indeed Envy is often a hidden or disguised emotion - that few women admit to. After all, to do so is to:

 "...admit that one is ungenerous, mean, small-hearted." Joseph Epstein, Envy:  The Seven Deadly Sins, (NY: Oxford University Press, 2003) 1.

MissLed women who Envy tend to overpraise, or say one thing while meaning another, regarding the object of their envy. They usually do not admit their Envy explicitly, claiming instead that they have been cheated - whether by the envied party or by the surrounding society. Often they declare they seek to compete on a level playing field, but maintain that the competition has been "fixed." Yet, in truth, Envy remains the motive behind many MissLed women's behavior.

"For the envious person...the question, when he or she sees someone who has had greater fortune is, Why not me?" Ann and Barry Ulanov, Cinderella and Her Sisters, (Philadelphia: Westminster Press, 1983) xxii.

"It's difficult in our society not to succumb to feelings of envy where money is concerned." Bonnie Eaker, Ph.D., Financial Infidelity, (NY:  Hudson Street Press, 2008) 199.

Unfortunately, landmines of Envy and resentment prosper among too many MissLed women. Their  standards for winning fame, money, and status are fluid  - and often in dispute. Increasingly, there are underlying tensions of Envy in relationships between women that influences some toward competition rather than cooperation. Their competitiveness comes in a destructive guise: a subtle and sophisticated game of one-upmanship. Truth is, the current consumerist/materialist culture is very reliant on female Envy (and greed). MissLed women misconstrue the actual situation:  They cannot play an endless game of ego gratification through desiring external (and essentially meaningless) "stuff,"without the game being at the expense of themselves and other women engaged in the same lunacy. The acquisition/consumption game is set up for all women to lose:

"The entire advertising industry...can be viewed as little more than a vast and intricate Envy-creating machine.  Displaying all that LUXE - those clothes, cars, jewelry, and the rest of it - advertisements suggest that all one's desires are easily within reach.  They aren't, of course, but even if they were, one may be sure that one's Envy would not be permitted to sleep - further advertising is there to ensure against that." Joseph Epstein, Envy:  The Seven Deadly Sins, (NY: Oxford University Press, 2003) xxiv.

"Rather than spot envy in oneself, it seems so much more convenient instead to lay one's envious feelings off on one's good taste, keen critical sense, scrupulous judgment." Joseph Epstein, Envy:  The Seven Deadly Sins, (NY: Oxford University Press, 2003) 21.

Few realize just how influential, pervasive, and destructive the emotion of Envy is in society.  Due to rampant materialism and increasing competition, Envying - called "admiring" by some - is too often accepted - even encouraged - in women.   Because it is "normal" and seems to benefit the MissLed who use it most - it prospers. When MissLed  women compare themselves to other women, one of two things can happen, neither of which benefits them. Most often (this is by far the more common tendency), they lose.  This dampens their fragile vanity (cloaked as "self-esteem.")  The second outcome of comparison is they (seemingly) "win." However, any "win," in fact, merely contributes to another problem - arrogance.  And, of course, the outcome of arrogance is often isolation - from their fellow women.  Isolated women are much more likely to be dehumanized by others. They receive less sympathy or feel empathy from others.  Even worse, those isolated can be treated with anger, disgust, or contempt.

Compounding the rise of Envy in MissLed women is that men have been added to those who are Envied.  In the past, women's Envy was usually reserved for other women. However, with women now  often competing with men in the workplace, some MissLed women misguidedly Envy male power, talents, successes, or wealth.  When added to the all-too-common Envy of other women, Envy of men at work has serious consequences for women's happiness and career satisfaction.
(As a rule, women are more likely than men to feel jealous or Envious of  relationships, while men are more often tormented by differences in status, income and power).

Historically, prospering societies developed and nurtured coping mechanisms to reduce the prominence of this most dangerous of human traits. In contrast, unsuccessful, declining societies allow Envy to be come prominent. The costs of Envy to MissLed women in our increasingly discontented society are significant: conformity, non-expression, and loss of potentially deep, meaningful friendships and alliances. In the current culture, if a woman expresses herself, she may evoke MissLed's women's envious disapproval.  Consequently, many women choose to keep quiet.  If she loves herself and carries herself with confidence, she may  evoke their resentment. If she seems too happy with herself, she may evoke the MissLed women's jealousy. If she stands out, she may be compelled to stand alone. In the face of all this potentially aggressive and passive aggressive Envy, many women decide to play it safe. They remain stagnant, frozen in place.  They choose to not rock the boat, to not risk isolation or ostracization. The cost of this lost potential to society is inestimably large.

Closely related to Envy, Jealousy is a toxic mix of resentment and helplessness.  It often grabs MissLed women by the throat when they fear that they may lose something they value to someone else.  They are jealous when they perceive that others have qualities or possessions or achievements that they also want. They misperceive that, if only they had those, they would become a more successful or attractive person.  Their propensity for Jealousy  stems from their often desperate desire for validation, approval, respect or attention.  This toxic brew of inadequacy and anger torments many MissLed women.


In a tragic irony, the presence of Jealousy is poison in a relationship - the very aspect of life many women treasure most.  It is smothering at the start of their relationships, and downright destructive in their long-term ones. It is also profoundly unattractive, because it is simply a visible symptom of MissLed women's insecurity.

Fundamentally, Jealousy is an internal emotion - caused by their fear. It is pronounced in MissLed women who are afraid they are not good enough, that they are going to lose someone, or that they will be excluded.  In essence, they are afraid they won't be liked - or loved.  MissLed women never learn to control this fear and Jealousy in the same way that many never master controlling anger and other strong emotions. (Often MissLed women try to pacify and/or ignore their fears.) In fact, MissLed women's lack of self-development and dim awareness of their own failings, bad habits, and flaws make them more susceptible to Jealousy. This often stems from a feeling of failure or bitterness they imagined they would in their career or relationship.

MissLed women's main Jealousy triggers are:

• Lack of self-confidence
• Low self-esteem
• Low self-image
• Fear
• Insecurity

These typically serve as triggers for the five primary types of  Jealousy:

1. Competition Jealousy
2. Egotism Jealousy
3. Exclusion Jealousy
4. Possessive Jealousy
5. Fear Jealousy

With women's new freedoms, Competition Jealousy is increasingly common in the workplace and in sport. In these arenas, MissLed women often struggle mightily with jealousy. Some are nearly desperate to show others that THEY have desirable characteristics and can be successful in their career or sport. MissLed women can also exhibit this type of Jealousy in friendship circles and with siblings. They will compare and compete with friends and siblings, in terms of attractiveness, intelligence and success.

Egotism Jealousy is about their desire for identity and worth. This comes from their inappropriately acute desire for esteem and respect from others. If the MissLed women who feel this emotion do not satisfy this desire, they often will feel frustrated, socially weak, and inferior.

Exclusion Jealousy occurs when MissLed women feel that they are purposely being left out of something - they perceive that colleagues purposely exclude them.

Possessive and fear Jealousy are normally associated with partners and lovers. MissLed women often fear losing control of their partners.  This leaves them prone to feeling very Jealous when their partner displays an interest in another woman. This is an example of their lack of self-esteem and confidence rising to the surface.  Essentially, they fear abandonment.

Irrational Jealousy also exists in some MissLed women. This is prompted by imagined or misperceived events, or when their minds create beliefs that are not rational.  MissLed women with irrationally Jealous thinking are too controlled by their emotions.  They wrongly perceive that something is amiss - even though there are no real signs that these feelings have merit.

Taken in combination, Envy and Jealousy wreak havoc on MissLed women's lives.
The common feelings produced by Envy and Jealousy include:

•   Infuriation and anger that they bottle up inside
•   Bitterness and resentment
•   A sense of inadequacy, failure, breakdown or humiliation
•   A sense of powerlessness, loss of control or frustration

"Little is good about envy, except shaking it off, which, as any of us who have felt it deeply knows, is not so easily done." Joseph Epstein, Envy:  The Seven Deadly Sins, (NY: Oxford University Press, 2003) 3.

Like Pride and Covetousness, Envy does not have to be destructive.  MissLed women can use
feelings of Envy for motivation to emulate their heroes or heroines or strive to achieve the excellence shown by others:

"Aristotle, in "The Rhetoric", wrote of emulation as good envy, or envy ending in admiration, and thus in the attempt to imitate the qualities one began by envying." Joseph Epstein, Envy:  The Seven Deadly Sins, (NY: Oxford University Press, 2003) 3.

In contrast to all the negative outcomes,  women who refuse to be MissLed in this way are much more likely to be content - to flourish in life and to prosper at work.  They may not have an "exciting career" in a high status position, but instead will enjoy a much more satisfying role in life in a worthwhile, meaningful career pursuit, such as teaching or nursing.  When they add fulfilling work to a happy personal life, this allows them to psychologically and emotionally benefit themselves, other women, men, and children.  In fact, most women who are free of the shackles of Envy, feel justified personal satisfaction from their superior ability to inspire men and nurture, and, to a great extent, educate the next generation. Women who are MissLed by Jealousy and Envy, on the other hand, often find themselves bitter, sullen, disillusioned, and lonely. In the end, Envy is a self-limiting, self-defeating vice for too many MissLed women.

4.  ANGER: 

"ANGER IS EVERYWHERE."  Gary Chapman, Anger:  Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way,  (Chicago:  Northfield Publishing, 2007) 9.

Anger can be shown via:

1.    Rage
2.    Fury
3.    Malice
4.    Contempt
5.    Hatred
6.    Cruelty
7.    Resentment
8.    Bitterness
9.    Indignation
10.  Vindictiveness
11.   Spite
12.   Aggression
13.   Exasperation
14.   Annoyance

It is often indicated when MissLed women belittle, speak sarcastically (often falsely claiming to be "just kidding"), or constantly criticize or complain. The bottom line is that MissLed women too often allow Anger to reign in their lives.

Compounding the Anger problem is that MissLed women are given tacit approval by society to be
angry.  Society has misguided many women into confusing "empowerment" with inappropriate Anger. For MissLed women of this mindset, anything that men (and sometimes other women) don't do in accordance with their wants or wishes is worthy of Anger.  This can range from annoyance to rage. Anger is now on the rise with MissLed women in part because they have been encouraged
to be sensitive to slights which or unintended or even imagined:

"Most angry people are also overly sensitive.  They are too easily hurt, thin-skinned, quick to feel insulted. One result is that they get angry all the time over stuff other people would ignore." Ronald T. Potter-Efron, Angry All The Time, (Oakland, Ca:  New Harbinger Publications, 2004) 4.

In its purest form, Anger (also known as wrath) presents itself as self-destructiveness, violence, and hate.  Uncontrolled anger negatively affects MissLed women's personal or social well-being. Many MissLed women are prone to Anger because they have not been successful or they are not happy.  Hence, Anger stems from their pain, fear, shame, guilt and frustration:

"Anyone can become angry - that is easy, but to be angry with the right person at the right time, and for the right purpose and in the right way - that is not within every one's power, and that is not easy."  - Aristotle     Gary Chapman, Anger:  Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way,  (Chicago:  Northfield Publishing, 2007) 12.

"Consistently angry people are insecure people."  Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap,  (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 72.

"Annoyance, irritation, bitterness, exasperation, frustration, resentment, aggravation, indignation, fury, and rage are just some of the labels given to various intensities of anger, each one offering a different level of protection." Marcia Cannon, Ph. D., The Gift of Anger, (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2011) 8.

It often is  MissLed women's first reaction to adverse situations. Often, it occurs when they perceive that their behavior or words are challenged by others. They inappropriately react in Anger that they feel  -  instead of respond by restraint in a measured, appropriate, mature way.  In their misguided minds, when a "right" (which MissLed women too often misperceive as an expectation or entitlement) has been violated, their Anger is a just response. Some of this is explained by their misunderstanding of the difference between prudent assertiveness and strident, overly aggressive behavior and communication. This is also due to their habit of bad thought patterns.  When these are coupled with their often-excessive pride Anger is their emotion of choice -  too often rashly expressed or acted upon. Indeed, in this instant-gratification, feelings-dominant culture, they have become increasingly impatient with the faults of others (especially men).  They often lead to a desire to seek revenge via verbal outbursts, physical violence or vigilantism. Thanks also to today's woman-as-victim culture, MissLed women too often find it permissible to stay hurt and angry (even bitter).

Forgiveness is quite difficult for Angry MissLed women to grant. In their relationships, instead of forgiveness or tolerance, they choose Anger to attempt to control, chasten, or change their children or man. Their Anger in these realms are often due to their lack of self-discipline or self-knowledge.  This leaves them unable  to express Anger productively, and resolve matters with maturity and justice. This is even more acute with those that are intensely Angry. They often lack any mercy for any of those alleged to provoke their self-righteous indignation. Witness the increasingly brazen verbal and physical outbursts of Anger by MissLed women that are commonly depicted in the media and, even more alarmingly, witnessed in real life.  Not surprisingly, these are often excused as outliers or merely for publicity or attention.  They are often claimed to be cause by an emotional injury,  or rationalized or excused as due to illness, past abuse,  or as "issues" or a "syndrome."  Similarly, angry outbursts are justified as a response to women's alleged victim hood or as an expression of personal "empowerment." They don't understand that it is almost impossible to feel angry unless one is convinced that they are correct, or if a person is humiliated and defensive because they are wrong. Despite this, MissLed women self-righteously believe that venting their Anger is justified or helpful, but they are wrong:

"Anger only works for a little while. The guilt or shame or hurt will come back." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap,  (San Francisco:  Jossey-Bass, 2003) 1.

"Anger is a big problem for many women, and it doesn’t matter how men treat them or what men do for them, they’re still going to be angry." Michelle Langley, Women's Infidelity, (St Louis:  McCarlan Publishing, 2005) 125.

"When they do not get the respect they hunger for, the ego's ultimate weapon, ANGER,
engages.  It is a defense mechanism against feelings of vulnerability.  Anger is the
illusion of control that makes them feel powerful, when in fact they are out of
control.  And the less control people have over themselves, the more they try to
control the lives of others.  They need to be in charge of something, and since they
cannot get traction in their own lives, they seek to do it through influencing the
lives of others." David J. Lieberman, How to Change Anybody, (NY:  St. Martin's
Press, 2005) 50.



"Women may stay angry for several reasons. One is to protect themselves from future pain. Another, whether justified or not, is to punish their husbands. Unfortunately, many men are willing to accept a woman’s anger indefinitely, either because they are afraid of losing their wife, or they feel guilty for how they treated her, or both. Due to fear and guilt, a man will often take total blame for the marriage not working out. His willingness to accept full responsibility alleviates the need for his wife to take any responsibility for the failure of the marriage. Some women also use anger to manipulate men. It’s the whoever-gets-the-angriest-wins game. Anger is a defense mechanism. People, just like animals, use displays of anger to ward off attacks. Women use anger to intimidate men." Michelle Langley, Women's Infidelity, (St Louis:  McCarlan Publishing, 2005) 125.

"There's a fine line separates being direct from being blunt and assertive from being abrasive, being strong-minded from being stubborn, being sensitive from being histrionic, or being spontaneous from being impulsive.  Knowing the difference means recognizing the truth about your behavior, which is the first step to positive change." Mark Goulston, Philip Goldberg, Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behaviors,  (NY:  Perigee Books, 1996) xiii.


In U.S. society, women are not supposed to express Anger openly. They are also discouraged from
remaining angry. These make both men and other women uncomfortable - they seem threatening. The open expression of anger often creates a fear in others that their relationships are in danger.  Without feeling comfortable to release it openly, MissLed women instead absorb Anger into a sense of  helplessness, depression, anxiety, and other energy-sapping emotions. MissLed women don't understand that the feeling of Anger (however powerful) is simply an emotion. They simply don't know what to do with it, or how to interpret it. Anger is their choice for self-defense.  It's what announces in their head that they have had enough.  It tells them when their rights or boundaries have been violated.  It tells them they have been disparaged or abused, maligned or manipulated.  It is their emotion that screams for justice or cessation.   Mismanaging Anger is the reason many MissLed women whimper, manipulate, cry, or hyperventilate as their sideways expressions of Anger.  Their fragile egos and lack of conviction about their resources to maintain mental and emotional equilibrium in the face of perceived adversity leave them prone to Anger. Deep down, they display Anger and hide vulnerability because they are afraid - they lack confidence or self-acceptance. This side-stepping of an honest, mature Anger response hurts not only women, but the men, friends, and family members who try to love them.  Anger often becomes the most destructive force in MissLed women's marriages and relationships. It may result in the death of loving feelings, or even in verbal or physical abuse.  When enveloped in such bottomless hate and bitterness, Anger is an agent of destruction in their lives. Their Anger sours their dispositions, pollutes their thinking, and corrupts their connections:

"Consider the things that make you angry.  Your sloppy child, your lazy colleague, your insensitive spouse, the car that won't start, the snotty salesclerk, the boss who refuses to recognize your worth, your mother-in-law with the critical smirk. The list is endless.  We get lied to, manipulated, fooled. We get insulted, ridiculed, used.  Life treats us unfairly, dammit! Doesn't that give us the right to be angry?"  Carol Larsen Hegarty, Earnie Larsen,  From Anger to Forgiveness,  (NY:  Ballantine Books, 1992) 67.

"Our feelings of Anger are triggered by our negative, irrational, catastrophic thoughts." This is the main reason we sometimes get into such a state over minor aggravations." Carol Larsen Hegarty, Earnie Larsen,  From Anger to Forgiveness,  (NY:  Ballantine Books, 1992) 69.

"When adults have NOT learned to process their Anger, marital and family turmoil usually results, sometimes spilling over at work or other settings."  Gary Chapman, Anger:  Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way,  (Chicago:  Northfield Publishing,  2007) 10.

Three particularly damaging types of MissLed women's anger are Rage, Malice and Contempt.
All of these are far too common and visible now due to their increasing prevalence in pop culture.
(often justified or rationalized as "justified" or "provoked"). In fact, society keeps
lowering the bar of what is an acceptable way for MissLed women to express Anger.  Witness the
physical lashing out by many women on Reality TV - no longer shocking, now expected. 
In addition, the acceptable level of female Anger as expressed in words (and the concurrent
expletives) has also shifted.  Hardly an eye blinks when women shriek and scream at their
men in Rage - it is assumed that their men did something to "deserve" it.

1. Rage occurs when MissLed women - often narcissists - reach a mental state at the extreme range of the intensity spectrum of anger.  It usually demonstrates hostile, affective or reactive aggression, wherein MissLed women lose self-control. It denotes angry aggression, motivated by causing harm to others, and is characterized by their impulsive thinking and lack of prudent planning.  The purpose of the MissLed women's rage is to remove a threat or incapacitate the person who they think is causing the rage. Rage tends to be expressed when they perceive (or, more often, misperceive) a threat to their pride, position, status or dignity.  Their bodies revert to a more primal instinct-  they may experience tunnel vision, muffled hearing, increased heart rate and hyperventilation.  Expressions of rage can be very intense, often distinguished by distorted facial expressions and by threats (or execution) of physical attack. In this frenzied state of mind, they misconstrue and misthink.  Lacking a restraint on their emotions, they lash out instead.  Rage is on the far extreme of the intensity spectrum of anger. (The other end of the spectrum is annoyance).  They often can focus only on the source of their anger. These behaviors are so disturbing that many (especially men) would not like to admit exists in females, yet seems to be markedly on the rise with MissLed women.

2.  Fury is closely related to rage, as it is MissLed women's feeling of intense anger; "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" speaks volumes regarding the impact on those encountering a furious MissLed woman. Fury is their destructive rage - verging on madness. (Interestingly, the origin of "Fury" comes from the Furies in Greek & Roman Mythology:  Three terrible winged goddesses with serpentine hair, Alecto, Megaera, and Tisiphone, who pursued and punished doers of unavenged crimes).

3.  Malice is demonstrated by those MissLed women who desire to inflict injury, harm, or suffering on someone.  They seek to do so either because of a hostile impulse or out of deep-seated meanness. They may bear malice against a person because they have done something harmful to their interests, because they are doing harm to them, because they will do them harm in the future, or because they have done harm to their friends. Like rage, malicious behavior is now often glamorized in Reality TV shows as "drama" or "cat fights." In this way, it is rationalized as merely part and parcel of rivalries between women.  This contributes to  the increasing normalization of malicious behavior in the mainstream.


4.  Contempt is another intensely negative emotion that is felt by too many current MissLed women. It is shown when they regard a person or group of people as inferior, base, or worthless (often their perceived rivals, or, less commonly, men). Often MissLed women show contempt while being sarcastic or scornful, or despising or dishonoring those of lower status.  It is often brought about by MissLed women's combination of anger and disgust.

Contempt can also play a significant role in bringing down their relationships. This is due to its destructive nature - similar in some ways to giving into greed or a holding a grudge:

"Men don't understand that women are not only not attracted to a man who gives them everything they want, but they have contempt for him." Douglas Wixom, Ph. D., The Moral Man's Guide to the Game of Romance, (Springville, UT:  Bonneville Books, 2004)  39.

MissLed women feel contempt when their skewed judgment determines that someone's moral or personal failing has compromised their standing vis-à-vis an interpersonal standard that they deem important.  The contempt they feel for that person is a misguided, acutely angry response to a perceived  failure to meet this interpersonal standard.  It is experienced as a highly visceral emotion, similar to disgust.  In contrast, contempt can be shown by a cool disregard of someone's presence or dignity. It has a caustic comparative element, wherein a MissLed woman has a misplaced “positive self-feeling” compared to the object of their scorn.  They then feel justified by psychologically withdrawing and distancing themselves from the object of their contempt.  Women who feel contempt tend to haughtily expect others to remove the object of their contempt, or that the object of contempt should remove itself.

Malicious MissLed women purposely put others through emotional, psychological or physical suffering.  They do this either for their entertainment or amusement, or to  watch them suffer. It is these MissLed women's deliberate intention to do injury to another party, often with recklessness as to whether such harm should occur. They inflict the emotional or physical wound with an awareness that their act may result in some physical or psychological harm.  Often, malicious, angry outbursts are used by some MissLed women to control or manipulate men. Wrathful, malicious anger is often vengeance rationalized as justice.  In the hands of a MissLed woman, it is then perverted to revenge and spite:

"Women today aren’t seeking equality. They want retribution - revenge." Michelle Langley, Women's Infidelity, (St Louis:  McCarlan Publishing, 2005) 119.

Spiteful women are petty, mean-spirited, and unreliable. These MissLed women revel in making a sport of being cruel, vicious and vengeful. A fundamental error many MissLed women make with anger is that it is their misevaluation of what causes them to feel anger. It often is based on their faulty thinking - assuming malice or bad intent from others' actions. women  never learned the proper emotional guidance to handle or manage different types of anger effectively. They fail to realize that any pushy or loud anger serves only to deepen their woes. Consequently, virtuous, wise men are turned off; friends are often put off and even turn away, and family members may pull away from fear or discomfort. Sadly, this weakness profoundly damages these women's chances for successful, happy relationships with men or peers. MissLed women have little or no desire to discover ways to neutralize the tensions in the male-female combat zone, preferring delusion instead: Blaming their failings and frustrations on who society says "deserves" punishment - men:

"Anger, particularly when a man knows he is not the original cause of it, makes a woman seem capricious and unpredictable."  Conell Cowan, Melvyn Kinder, Women Men Love, Women Men Leave, (NY:  Signet-Penguin Books, 1987) 102.


MissLed women didn't learn how to evaluate and manage their emotions in their youth:

"...most adults continue to express anger in a raw, harmful way because they are habituated to childish anger.  Though it makes no sense to yell, evade, act defensively, pout, or gripe, adults do these things, well, because that's just the way they have always done them." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 19.

Some MissLed women misguidedly develop the habit of stifling or denying their anger. They then are unable to communicate effectively  - they are unable to speak the truth and be direct. Instead, their passive-aggressive tactics include silent submission, ineffective fighting and blaming, nagging, pitching a fit, and emotional distancing. Well-adjusted and wise women, on the other hand, know and practice the invaluable habits and virtues of honesty, moral courage, and self-control. All are absolutely critical  for healthy, balanced relationships with family members and friends. MissLed women are prone to anger due to their fear and their inability to listen well:

"Fearful people...put so much energy into unnecessarily defending themselves that they may never see behind the scenes for the purpose of understanding their detractor more fully. As listening produces insight and understanding, anger is often seen as an unnecessary response. Even if anger is warranted, a good listener usually concludes that the anger does not need to be accompanied by forcefulness or manipulation." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass,  2003) 109.

"Whether they recognize it or not, people who repeatedly respond to life with unseemly anger are clinging to dreamlike wishes.  They often find their real world experience to be negative or hurtful, so they nurse a fantasy about life under much more pleasing circumstance...The anger can represent a yearning to force life into an ideal paradigm." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 111.


Some MissLed women harbor a deep, emotional and extreme dislike - Hatred - directed against a certain object or class of objects. The objects of such hatred can vary widely, from inanimate objects to animals, themselves or other people, entire groups of people, mankind in general, existence, or the whole world. Hatred is the sum of their fears and acquired powerlessness in the face of a perceived injustice.


5. Cruelty is shown when MissLed women display indifference to suffering, or even positive pleasure in inflicting it. They can also be cruel by using others - especially men.  This includes using them for free rides - meals, drinks, gifts, etc.  Other types of cruelty toward men include emotional manipulation, criticizing them in front of others, or even physical violence. (Buoyed by media messages, some MissLed women feel it perfectly acceptable to hit their husbands or boyfriends -  they are well aware that few would ever hit them back). This type of woman feels like they can inflict any kind physical pain on them without fear of repercussion.

6.  Resentment is the type of anger  felt as a result of a real or imagined wrong done to MissLed women. What makes resentment so destructive? It eats up their mental energy. It can be their obsession. MissLed women relive their angry resentment over and over again. It can be triggered by an emotionally disturbing experience felt again or relived in their minds. To MissLed women, resentment often appears as remorse, sparked by expressions of injustice or humiliation. Common sources of resentment include:

• Publicly humiliating incidents such as accepting negative treatment without voicing any protest
• Object of regular discrimination or prejudice
• Envy or jealousy
• Feeling used or taken advantage of by others
• Having achievements go unrecognized.  

Resentment is most powerful when it is felt toward someone with whom MissLed women are close.  An injury that results in resentful feelings that is inflicted by a friend or loved one leaves them feeling betrayed as well as resentful.  These feelings can have deep, lasting effects. Resentment is an emotionally debilitating condition that, when unresolved, can have a variety of negative results on the MissLed women experiencing it.  These include:

• Development of a hostile, cynical, sarcastic attitude that may become a barrier against other healthy relationships
• Lack of personal and emotional growth
• Difficulty in self-disclosure
• Trouble trusting others
• Loss of self-confidence
• Overcompensation

Resentment, then, is an major obstacle to MissLed women having equal moral relations with others.  It must be handled and expunged via introspection and forgiveness:

"The strong reaction of resentment almost never appears to be warranted by what sets it off. It's always the product of a long history of backed-up unhappiness."
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-therapist-is-in/201103/living-resentment-is-taking-poison-and-hoping-the-other-guy-will-get

"Resentments embody a basic choice to refuse to forgive, an unwillingness to let bygones be bygones and bury the hatchet. We review and rehash our painful past, even as we profess to want to let go of it. We do so because we believe the illusion that by belaboring our resentment, we will somehow achieve the justice we believe we are due. We cling to a futile need to be "right," which overrides the capacity to heal."
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-therapist-is-in/201103/living-resentment-is-taking-poison-and-hoping-the-other-guy-will-get

Resentment, in sum, is dangerous to MissLed women's mental and even physical health:

"Resentment enhances stress by breaking down concentration and draining off  energy that would otherwise serve the task at hand...Resentment increases stress by lowering the capacity to cope with it...Chronic resentment puts you at higher risk of hypertension, stroke, heart disease,
and cancer."
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/anger-in-the-age-entitlement/201107/health-in-the-age-entitlement
"Anger in the Age of Entitlement," by Steven Stosny
Published on July 1, 2011

8. Bitterness is anger that is neither consistent nor rational. MissLed bitter women are their own worst enemies.  It is, in fact, very difficult for anyone to maintain any kind of happy relationship with a chronically bitter person. Not surprisingly, bitterness is consequently a major contributing cause of marital and family problems:
"They feel the world has treated them unfairly," says Dr. Michael Linden, a German psychiatrist
who labeled the behavior. "It's one step more complex than anger. They're angry plus helpless."
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/side-effects/200905/bitterness-the-next-mental-disorder
"Bitterness: The Next Mental Disorder?"
by Christopher Lane, Ph.D., Published on May 5, 2009

Tragically, Bitterness is one of the most crushing mental problems in some MissLed women's lives. It causes loss of emotional stability, peace, and joy. 

MissLed women can also be quite susceptible to Aggravation.  This occurs too easily to hurried, short-tempered, MissLed women.  It happens when those around them rouse their displeasure - usually by their misperception of being persistently goaded, mistreated, or "disrespected".

9. Indignation is MissLed women's strong displeasure at something they consider unjust, offensive, insulting, or base. It is their self-righteous anger or disgust aroused by something perceived or misperceived as an indignity, notably an offense or injustice.

10. Vindictiveness is shown by MissLed women who are disposed to seek revenge or a desire to hurt.;
Spitefully, they seek to avenge or sabotage due to misconstrued un­fair­ness. It is often their misguided, malevolent desire for revenge, driven by their out of control tempers. In effect, it is an arrogant, often ruthless practice of neg­a­tive re­ciprocity.

11. Similarly, MissLed women show Spite when they act out with petty, venomous ill will or hatred, with the disposition to irritate, annoy, or thwart another. This type of anger prompts an urge to  intentionally hurt or humiliate. In their maliciousness, they often desire to harm another. When MissLed women are spiteful in a subtle way, this is considered catty - which seems to be in a quite visible upward trend.

12. MissLed women show Aggression by hostile or destructive behavior or actions. They are in the habit of launching attacks against their misperceived "enemies." Aggression can be can be physical, mental, or verbal. Typically, they express their aggression by using a variety of non-physical means.  Alarmingly, however, aggressive physical outbursts are increasingly common. Frustration is a major cause of such aggression tactics.  In relationships, MissLed women's aggression can be in the form of humiliation, intimidation, coercing, shaming, malicious teasing, shunning, and other forms of emotional abuse. 

13. Exasperation occurs for some MissLed women when they feel frustration.  Most commonly, it is their emotional response to opposition. Related to disappointment, it arises from perceived resistance to the fulfillment of their will. The greater the obstruction, and the greater their will, the more their frustration is likely to be. Causes of frustration may be internal or external. In MissLed women, internal frustration arise from challenges in fulfilling personal goals and desires, instinctual drives and needs, or dealing with perceived deficiencies, such as a lack of confidence or fear of social situations. Conflict can also be an internal source of frustration; when one has competing goals that interfere with one another, it can create cognitive dissonance. While coping with frustration, some MissLed Women may engage in passive–aggressive behavior, making it difficult to identify the original cause(s) of their frustration, as their responses are indirect. A more direct, and common response, is a propensity towards aggression. Although mild frustration due to internal factors (e.g. laziness, lack of effort) is often a positive force (inspiring motivation), it is more often than not a perceived uncontrolled problem that instigates more severe frustration.

14. Annoyance is MissLed women's unpleasant mental state that is characterized by such effects as vexation, irritation and distraction.  These all tend to block their conscious, rational thinking.  With the current hectic, competitive society, impatience and distrust of others motives leads many MissLed women to easily become annoyed. Those MissLed women who allow themselves to be easily annoyed are known as petulant.


"Most of us find ourselves exploding from time to time and regretting it later. The explosions occur because we don't like our anger and we try to keep it inside. It works like a pressure cooker. We can only suppress or apply pressure against our anger for so long before it erupts. Periodic eruptions can cause all kinds of problems." William Grey Defoore, Ph.D, Anger, Deal with It, Heal It, Stop It from Killing You, (Deerfield Beach, FL: HCI Books, 2007) 2.

"When we are afraid of losing control, it's not anger we are afraid of. The wild, destructive force we sometimes feel inside is rage. Rage is a mixture of unexpressed pain, fear and anger that has been building up over a long period of time. It results from being hurt and scared and keeping all the feelings inside." William Grey Defoore, Ph.D, Anger, Deal with It, Heal It, Stop It from Killing You, (Deerfield Beach, FL: HCI Books, 2007) 5-6.


Regardless of the form, all men and women, of course, experience anger.  What differentiates MissLed women, however, is that they do not how to maturely, wisely manage their anger.  They don't get past the self-protective stage of anger, which gives a person,  "a power boost to make you feel bigger and stronger so that you can face a person who seems more powerful than you or a situation that seems too difficult to manage." Marcia Cannon, Ph. D., The Gift of Anger,  (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2011) 3.

They never reach the second, more mature stage of anger, what Marcia Cannon in her book "The Gift of Anger" called the "awareness and growth stage."  This is where a person is quieter and more thoughtful, and can use anger as a guide to healing emotional pain. Marcia Cannon, Ph. D., The Gift of Anger, (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2011) 3.

There are several different forms of anger: definitive and distorted. Definitive anger has a correct and useful purpose; distorted anger can occur when something doesn't go as they as hoped:

"You know how painful it is to live in the grip of anger.  You know that the attacking and blaming have solve none of the problems between you. For all the shouting, you are never heard. For all the struggle, you remain helpless."  Kim Paleg Ph. D,, Matthew McKay, Ph. D., When Anger Hurts Your Relationship, (Berkely:  New Harbinger Publications, 2001) 137.

In essence, MissLed women's anger is self-defeating:

"Shackled by insecurity, fragile egotism, shame, or disgust, their anger is so raw that it can be displayed in circumstances that may not really warrant anger, and it is commonly displayed in a manner that completely sabotages any possibility for relationship growth or healing." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap,  (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 7.

"When a woman shows her anger, she is likely to be dismissed as irrational or worse."
Harriet Lerner, Ph. D., Dance of Anger, (NY: Harper & Row, 1985) 2.

MissLed women will often disingenuously claim that their anger must be expressed ("vented") - as if it is beyond their control:

"...they often assume that they have no choice in the way it is expressed. They insinuate that anger is a mysterious, uncontrollable reaction." (seeking to avoid responsibility for anger flare ups)
Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 43.

Or, even worse, that others are just going to have to work around their inevitable anger:

"Others dismiss their anger problems by saying, "That's just the way I am." These people see themselves as having a strong inclination toward an opinionated spirit, as they see nothing wrong with it.  When irritability, impatience, or abruptness occurs, they later explain it by saying, "Look, this is the way I've been all my life, so you're just going to have to get used to it. I'm never going to be a namby-pampby type of person...This surely represents poor reasoning." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 43.



MissLed women's anger can be aggressive, or passive-aggressive:

"People who communicate anger with open aggression display their control wishes very clearly and  obviously.  They make little or no attempt to hide their lust for control as they speak forcefully and persuasively.  It is common for them to seek an opportunity to belittle, out argue, impose an opinion, shame, or bully others into submission.  Feeling strongly justified in their anger, they see their mission as force-feeding their perspective into the mind of their adversary.  The use of open aggression is their way of communication:  "I don't care if you agree with me or not, I WILL BE HEARD." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 60.

"People who use passive-aggressive forms of anger are perhaps the most controlling of all because they are adept at manipulating circumstances with the least amount of vulnerability.  They make heavy use of behaviors such as noncooperation or saying one thing while doing something entirely different.  They can hold stony silence, procrastinate, or give a half-hearted effort." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 60.



The crux of the problem, then, is not that women get angry, it is that MissLed women misunderstand when anger is justified and ineffective:

"Anger must be understood and embraced if we are to master its energy and be in charge of our own actions." William Grey Defoore, Ph.D, Anger: Deal with It, Heal It, Stop It from KillingYou, (Deerfield Beach, FL: HCI Books, 2007) xv.

Anger's ethical rating depends upon the quality of the vengeance and the quantity of the passion. When these are in conformity with the prescriptions of balanced reason, anger is not a vice. It is rather a praiseworthy thing and justifiable with a proper zeal. Anger can be utilized as energy for endurance and change.  Therefore, Anger is not always inappropriate, as long as it is just. Anger becomes effective when:

•  The anger is directed at the offending person (telling friends, ironically, may actually     increase anger).
•  The expression satisfies a need to influence the situation and/or correct an injustice.
•  The approach seems likely to change the other person's behavior, which means a person can    express themselves so they can understand their point of view and so they will be cooperative.

Anger can potentially mobilize psychological resources and boost determination toward correction of wrong behaviors, promotion of social justice, communication of negative sentiment and redress of grievances. In sum, then, Anger, can be valuable:

"...working through anger sparks self-reflection as we clarify who we are, how we feel about something, what we will or will not tolerate, and how we will can things."  Tim Murphy Ph. D., Loriann Hoff Oberlin, Ph.D., Overcoming Passive-Aggression, (NY: Marlowe & Company, 2005) 16.

"...sometimes such emotions are far from negative - they represent an appropriate response to conditions that demand the manifestation of anger or hate.  The crusade against anger and hatred may well be motivated by a genuine desire to minimize conflict and promote harmony.  But instructing people to come to terms with their strong feelings may represent the demand for acquiescence and conformism...In some cases the demand to curb strong passion could mean pressuring people to tolerate appalling acts of injustice and oppression." Frank Furedi, Therapy Culture, (London:  Routledge, 2004), 198.

or useful:

"The experience of anger not only does not have to become a springboard for foul treatment, it can actually prompt someone to stand up for needs and convictions in a positive manner." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 7.

"While it can be misused, anger can give you courage, determination, and the willingness to set limits and take action." Marcia Cannon, Ph. D., The Gift of Anger, (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2011) 8.

   
5.  Lust:  Legitimate pleasures are best controlled in the same way an athlete's muscles are: for maximum efficiency without damage. Lust becomes harmful when MissLed women have an imbalanced attachment to sexual activity.  They are too lustful when they use someone solely for their own physical pleasure. This self-destructive drive for carnal pleasure wreaks emotional and psychological havoc - many women pay a terrible  physical cost (STDs, undesired pregnancies, abortions). MissLed women have been bamboozled  by the seductive, yet misleading cultural messages that encourage women to pursue physical pleasure  in the same ways that men have (supposedly) always done. This is patently false.  In fact, few men have ever had the ability to pursue and enjoy casual sex without consequences.  Truth is, MissLed women's current mindset - that women can enjoy lust as men supposedly do -   fundamentally misstates the emptiness of sexual conquest for either sex:

"Pleasure is always temporary - and thereby unsatisfying in the long run - because it's all about immediate fleeting gratification of the body and ego." Karen Salomansohn, Prince Harming Syndrome,  (NY:  QNY Publishing, 2009) 21.

Those MissLed women who embrace lust have made sexual excitement, fulfillment, experimentation and "satisfaction" far too high a priority in their lives.  They fail to realize that Lust (as the many men who have been felled by its power can testify) strongly skews the evaluation of a prospective love and mating partner.  The evidence of the tragic consequences of the unleashing and mainstreaming of MissLed women's lust is, unfortunately, readily apparent. Witness the epidemic of unplanned pregnancies and STDs.  Just as tragically,  many  women's suffer from diminished self-worth and a related lack of trust for, and respect from, men.  MissLed women were sold a bill of goods when they were told that lustful wasn't dangerous or harmful.  They were told they will be fine if they practice "safe sex" and "protection" is used. For a few women, this is true - giving into to their lust results in sex for pure, physical pleasure.  However - in most cases, for the MissLed - it's not "safe" sex at all - physically, emotionally, or psychologically. As a result, many MissLed women spend the height of their most attractive, fertile years indulging their lusts.  Many are then left unmarried and alone -  disillusioned, cynical, emotionally damaged - in essence, used.

MissLed women don't understand how men's biology and psychology regarding sex differ significantly from theirs.  In fact, with casual sex, men may be momentarily attracted, but men typically don't form emotional attachments from sex.  Without this understanding, MissLed women condescendingly sneer that, when it comes to sex, men are "shallow." They then often cynically, and hypocritically, manipulate the situation to their advantage:

"Abysmally ignorant of the male biological imperatie, her response is to haughtily condemn it...A woman may not be able to share male lust, but she knows very well how to use it to her best advantage." Matthew Fitzgerald, Sex-Ploytation, (Willowbrook, Illinois:  April House Publishing, 1999) 17.

"If we believed that we were sexy and funny and competent and smart, we would not need to be like strippers or like men or like anyone other than our own, specific, individual selves."   Ariel Levy, Female Chauvinist Pigs, (NY:  Free Press, 2006) 200.

6.  Gluttony. This involves the over-indulgence and over-consumption of anything to the extreme. The MissLed glutton will do almost anything for another bite, drink, another luxury item,  or another round of trivial pleasures. This misfocus pertains not only to food, entertainment and alcohol. It can also involve an excessive desire for the company of others. MissLed Women have become increasingly shameless with their gluttonous drinking and cavorting in very public ways.  GNOs (Girls' Night Out) and Bachelorette parties are the most visible, egregious examples. These women see it as perfectly normal to often behave abominably in public.  Excessive consumption of rounds of shots, too many glasses of wine, far too much beer gulped - all of these mark the gluttonous, MissLed woman. Perceptive, virtuous men find such behavior instinctively disturbing. Salacious and vulgar public behavior by women alarm and appall them. Sleazy and lecherous men, on the other hand, are delighted by these groups.  Upon seeing them, they smile like a Cheshire cat - and prepare to pounce. More and more women seem to be struggling with regulating their impulses and appetites:

"Evidence of the female struggle with appetite is overwhelming. Five million women in the U.S. suffer from Eating Disorders; 80% report the experience of feeling too fat. Estimates on compulsive shopping range from two to eight percent of the general population and 16 percent of a college sample. Something is wrong here and its not anything as simple as Low Self-Esteem,  that great pathological scrap heap which onto which so many female behaviors (our obsessions with our weight, appearance, popularity) tend to get tossed." Caroline Knapp, Appetites: Why Women Want, (NY:  Counterpoint, 2003) 20.
 

MissLed women can be also be gluttonous by obsessing about how and what they eat: 

• Eating too expensively:  When MissLed women put excessive value and focus on the "best" food,   regardless of cost.
• Eating too much:   When MissLed women eat to the point of being too full - some even to the point that they need to purge.  After all, it is not just men who are overindulging in quantities of fast food  or at all-you-can-eat buffets.
• Eating too daintily:    When MissLed women are too particular about the food they purchase, order, or consume. For them, it is not about how nutritious or even tasty it is, rather how it is prepared,  how it appears, how it is presented, even from where it originated.

Gluttonous women are often extremely picky about how food is prepared.  These are indicators of their emotional distress:

"Picky eaters do score higher than others on tests of anxiety."  "Acquiring a Taste," Emily Anthes, Psychology Today, Jan/Feb 2011, 80.

Ironically, it was women, who were first to recognize the dangers and damage that imprudent,
gluttonous alcohol consumption afflicted on families. (Women led the Temperance movement and helped force Prohibition). As women now have access to money, power, and freedom to indulge their whims, they have too often decided to slide into gluttony.  Sadly, once again, the MissLed see this critical waste of their time and resources as "harmless fun."

7.  Sloth is MissLed women's absence of the a virtuous mindset that gives lives definition, meaning and passion.  Giving into sloth saps MissLed women of their energy, joy and hope in life. These women show a certain mental lameness, a disinterest in humanity and its future.  Often they are bored with the affairs of mankind. Sloth is a sense of powerlessness, of softness in their lives. Consequently, their lives are driven more by fear than by hope.  This is a kind of spiritual “vacuum” that some MissLed women fill with “reptilian-brain thinking.” It’s as though they can no longer envision making a difference in the world, so they focus on their own selfish needs. MissLed, slothful women are the kind that tend to be shiftless and seek an easy life, especially in the short-term. They fail to fully utilize their talents and gifts. Laziness and indifference is sloth - a sin of omission rather than of commission. It is immature and self-defeating:

"No one can be said to be living self-responsibly who has no productive purposes. Through work we support our existence. Through the exercise of our intelligence toward some useful ends, we become more fully human. Without productive goals and productive effort, we remain forever children." Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 1995) 112.

Unfortunately, too many women - especially the most attractive - choose the path of least resistance and slothfully avoid the challenging work and activities that will bring them the most fulfilling existence in the long-term. They have aspirations so low that they meet them mindlessly and effortlessly. In essence, they neglect to take on challenges - instead, they seek a life of comfort and self-indulgence, complacently enjoying pleasures of instant gratification:

"The number of spas have double since 1997, and the number of spa visits have tripled." Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, The Narcissism Epidemic,  (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 144.

Slothful MissLed women spend an inordinate amount of time doing nothing or doing only trivial things. They want to “take it easy,” "chillax," and not venture out of their comfort zone. In their sloth, they rarely consider making a sacrifice for someone else; they don't pay sufficient attention to the needs of others.  Sloth, can, however, be overcome by employing the virtue of diligence. To be diligent means to keep focused and pay attention to the work at hand. Slothful women reject diligence. By doing so, they tragically waste their potential.  Witness the often-miserable later lives of many beautiful women who choose to take the easy way out - who are habitually slothful - when their beauty gives them the power to do so. Especially for the attractive, slothful habits of the mind  have serious consequences for the MissLed women's success and happiness.  In essence, the slothful MissLed women are lazy:

"Laziness" is not a term we ordinarily encounter in books on psychology. And yet, is anyone unaware that sometimes we fail ourselves for no reason other than the disinclination to generate the effort of an appropriate response?  Sometimes we are just lazy; meaning we do not challenge inertia, we do not choose to awaken." Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 1995) 303.

"A life without effort, struggle, or suffering is an infant's dream." Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 1995) 304.

"Laziness is one motivation for being dishonest, including emotional laziness." Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 1995) 249. (MissLed women often lack  moral courage, instead seeking  peace at almost any price - especially peace of mind)

MissLed women who are slothful often lack commitment and live in a world characterized by mobility, passive entertainment, and self-indulgence. They then have a tendency to sink into lethargy, boredom, detachment, and apathy. Ironically, slothful habits easily attach to today's hectic and overburdened schedules. Some MissLed women are sure to take the steps to appear to be anything but slothful, yet that is exactly what they are.

Unfortunately for them, too many MissLed women neither cultivate or understand virtues:

"Virtues are the necessary skills required to navigate our life though this world. They are the qualities that enable us to make life's journey successful."  Tim Gray, Curtis Martin, Boys to Men, (Steubenville, Ohio:  Emmaus Road Publishing, 2001)  15.

Unfortunately, MissLed women have misguidedly followed the notions that the following behaviors and beliefs are virtues, when they are in fact not:

• Tolerance instead of Mercy
• Nonjudgmentalism instead of prudent discernment and judging others actions and behaviors   according to social norms.
• Unearned Self Esteem and Self Promotion instead of Modesty
• Gluttonous Shopaholism/Materialism instead of Thrift
• Niceness instead of righteousness
• Non-Violence instead of righteous, prudent wrath (sometimes involving measured violence)against evil and wrongdoers

There are, in fact, Seven Virtues which directly contradict each of the Sins (Pride, Envy, Anger/Wrath, Lust, Avarice/Greed, Gluttony, Sloth). Unfortunately for the MissLed women, and for society as a whole, they are, in contrast to the 7 deadly sins, increasingly rare:

1.  Humility: (currently discouraged) Being a humble woman has largely been discarded for self-promotion, supposed "empowerment" and alleged "self-expression:"

"Stark honesty is a necessary component in making the switch from pridefulness to humility." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass,2003) 95.

MissLed women fail to remember that they are limited:

"People are most attracted to and influenced by those whose egos can be held in check as they take the time to consider each side of an equation.  Even when your efforts to invoke humility do not always result in improving some one's reaction, you still gain by choosing humility because it keeps you from wallowing in your own harmful bitterness." Les Carter, Frank Minirth, The Anger Trap, (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2003) 96.

Many women seem to have forgotten that, "...true humility is strength:  the ability to see or evaluate yourself accurately and without defensiveness."  Jean M Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, Narcissism Epidemic,  (NY:  Free Press, 2004) 283.

Humility is a strength that involves  modest behavior, selflessness and the gift of respect.  It is the opposite of negative pride because it involves both a lack of preoccupation with the self, and a willingness to serve. Humility about one's gifts is just as desirable in women as it is in men. The lack of it in MissLed women is just as obnoxious as it is in men. MissLed women often misconstrue humility as being mere servility.  Meekness is misunderstood by many of them as weakness, when in fact it can be a great strength:

"Meekness is that aspect of selflessness which avoids harming, whether by action or inaction.  It takes a big self to be selfless.  A small self desperately holds itself together and is "into" itself." Peter Kreeft,  Back to Virtue,  (San Francisco:  Ignatius Press, 1989) 140.

Humility is also feigned by many MissLed women. They are well-versed in the language of humility - they (often publicly) are may be the first to EXPRESS concern, compassion, and sensitivity for the suffering.  These women seek credit for their mere words - they humble themselves without actually DOING anything that requires pain or sacrifice from them. Some women claim they are being "compassionate" are often cloaking their volunteerism or support of feel-good causes. In fact, it is can actually be them expressing condescension or contempt:

"The politics of 'compassion' degrades both the victims, by reducing them to objects of pity, and their would-be benefactors, who find it easier to pity their fellow citizens than to hold them up to impersonal standards, the attainment of which would make them respected. Compassion has become the human face of contempt."  Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, (NY: Bantam Books, 195) 308.

2.  Kindness: (in ever-shrinking supply) True kindness is genuine benevolence - giving of oneself with no thought of anything in return, or to others who can do nothing for the kind person.  It is generosity -  and a willingness to give freely and without request for commendation. MissLed women, however, prefer the appearance of kindness.  They often attend "feel-good" events to be seen performing painless, almost effortless public relations gestures.  This serves their selfish purposes -  to score image or likability points. Essentially, they perform acts of kindness in public as a form of impression management.


3.  Patience: (in very short supply) The culture of busyness entices MissLed women to live at a hectic pace.  In their view, patience is inefficient.  Rushing to and fro, constantly texting and/or checking their inbox on their smart phones, many MissLed women sink into the habit of impatience.  This leaves them too often expecting instant gratification as a customer, as a friend, or even as a romantic partner.

4. Chastity: (rare) The pattern of many women's emphasis on the public APPEARANCE of virtue continues here.  Many MissLed women's public protestations of chastity are belied by their private, quite lustful behavior. Many MissLed women never develop the self-mastery required to govern their passions.  In contrast, those who are able to master their impulses - by exercising self-control, in this case being appropriately chaste -  find dignity and peace of mind.

5.  Charity:  (Benevolence, helpfulness, generosity, or mercy - but only when convenient or
emotionally fulfilling) For MissLed women, it is used in a similar way as kindness in that their predominant actions of charity is often done publicly, (parties dressed up as fundraisers, 5K races "for the cure," etc.) so that they receive full credit for their supposed generosity, sensitivity, and "caring." In other words, they are seen at charity events or as "caring" online largely for impression management purposes.

6. Temperance:  (rarer still) Witness the legions of MissLed women - young and middle-aged -unashamedly  drunk in public. They include the "respectable" high-status middle-aged women unabashedly inebriated on wine, champagne, and Cosmos. What they have in common is that they MissLed that such public behavior is harmless. In truth, they are rightfully judged by discerning, quality men as being unworthy of trust and respect.

7.  Diligence: (mostly in self-interest). MissLed women often lack diligence. To be diligent means to keep focused and pay attention to the work at hand.  It is also involves  a constant and earnest effort to accomplish what they undertake. They fail to be diligent when they are not persistent in exerting the requisite effort of body or mind. This stems in large part from their socialization as children.  Brainwashed by indulgent parents and the feminized school system, which often promote unearned self-esteem, they expect almost any "effort" to be rewarded. Therefore, for MissLed women, since little or no diligence is required to gain credit and praise, they don't develop the habit of diligence.  Short-sightedly, these women then claim that merely "trying" is sufficient to get credit for an effort.


In addition, there are also four widely-acknowledged Cardinal Secular Virtues, which, in some cases,
MissLed women sadly are lacking:

1. Prudence
2. Mercy
3. Fortitude 
4. Justice

Prudence is care, caution, and thoughtful good judgment. It is also wisdom in looking ahead: sober decision-making and discretion in handling one's affairs. Those women with foresight prudently look ahead far into the future,  and plan accordingly. They do not, unlike too many MissLed women, allow themselves to get into large amounts of debt due to imprudent spending on Starbucks, sushi, shoes, girls' nights out, or purchasing cars and homes they can't afford.

Fortitude is forbearance, endurance, and the resolute ability to confront fear and uncertainty. Women certainly have admirably progressed in demonstrating fortitude. Their accomplishments in the workplace, in education, and at home attest to that. Some MissLed women, however, too often avoid challenges and don't confront their fears.

MissLed women do not handle the challenge of the last virtue - Justice - very well. Justice
is the proper moderation between self-interest and the rights and needs of others. This is where MissLed women's sins of envy and greed have misdirected them away from seeking justice.  Rather than doing the often heavy work of seeking justice, many seek only for themselves - they put their energies in their own (often emotional) "causes".  In addition, in order to be properly measured and prudent, Justice must be sought with mercy.  MissLed women, however, are often quite merciless and cruel when calling for what they claim as "justice." 

There is one additional virtue that is worth mentioning.  Valor describes the pursuit of courage and knowledge.  Now with the freedom to pursue higher education, women have certainly become more knowledgeable. Practical or profound wisdom and deep, meaningful knowledge, however, is not  properly valued and pursued by enough women.  The fact remains, in many ways, one is what one reads - MissLed women who choose to read merely entertaining books or watch such types of movies or television shows are choosing to not pursue material which could make a woman more knowledgeable, wise, and interesting. In terms of valor, while women have become a more physically courageous gender, too many lack moral and social courage.  Instead, MissLed women give in to peer pressure, take the easy way out (although the price is steeper as time goes by), stay in failing relationships rather than leave. In addition, they often fail to do what they know to be right or speak out against what they know to be wrong (often due to wanting to avoid conflict or confrontation or wanting to be perceived as "nice").  As a result, they live with the terrible awareness of being cowardly.

Courage, both physical and moral, and for both men and women, is an crucial civic virtue:

"...happiness depends on freedom, and freedom depends on courage," as Pericles said in his funeral oration." Bruce S. Thornton, The Wages of Appeasement, (NY:  Encounter Books, 2011) xviii.

Unfortunately, there are still more notions of "sin" that have been identified by other philosophers and thinkers that also describe misbehaviors of many MissLed women.

These include:

• MissLed women's 7 Sins of Omission
• Gandhi's 7 Social 7 Sins of Narcissism
• 7 Deadly Relational Sins
• Ian Fleming's New 7 Deadly Sins

I'll explain and explore those other "Sins" at another time.